Don’t Water the Seeds that Lead to Bitterness
Genesis 37:12-36
As we have already established, Joseph grew up in a difficult family environment where jealousy, anger & rivalry surrounded him on all sides. Unfettered & unchallenged anger will always lead to family & relational issues that most often results in a “blow up” that does great damage in a family. This happens in our day over and over.
Such was the way of Joseph’s formative years and such would become his fate one day as he approaches his brothers one afternoon as they take care of the family flocks.
A reading of Genesis 37:12-17 finds Joseph leaving home, traveling to Shechem and eventually finding them in Dothan. While uneventful in these sentences, they are simply a significant precursor to the great turning event in his young life that will eventually lead him to learn to trust God in any and every situation one finds themselves in the midst of.
Bitterness Unabated
Genesis 37:18 They saw him from afar, and before he came near to them they conspired against him to kill him. 19 They said to one another, “Here comes this dreamer. 20 Come now, let us kill him and throw him into one of the pits. Then we will say that a fierce animal has devoured him, and we will see what will become of his dreams.”
They had allowed themselves for far too long to allow their anger and jealously to remain without anyone of them bringing any kind of restraint upon what was in their hearts. Since they had grown comfortable with their hatred of their brother, it should be no surprise that this deep seated anger manifested itself in a plan to rid their lives of the dreamer.
The trouble with long lasting anger is that it “buys the lie” that freedom can only be found when the object of that anger is gone. The great trouble with this thinking is that it is all a lie, for the answer lies not in the object of our anger, but in the releasing of the anger and finding ourselves stepping out of the prison of bitterness.
If this does not happen, then the eventual fruit in a life is a marriage that dissolves, dependence upon substances, crime, a life of blaming others, or sexual or physical abuse. For the brothers, their deep anger could only find “supposed relief” in the murder of their brother. Again, at first they were totally comfortable with the idea.
Don’t Trust the Bitter
Genesis 37:21 But when Reuben heard it, he rescued him out of their hands, saying, “Let us not take his life.” 22 And Reuben said to them, “Shed no blood; throw him into this pit here in the wilderness, but do not lay a hand on him”—that he might rescue him out of their hand to restore him to his father.
Reuben steps in and rescues Joseph from certain death at the moment, for his plan would be to come back later and get Joseph and bring restore him to Jacob. The issue is that Reuben should have known that the bitter cannot be trusted to fully keep their word, for they are driven by a restlessness that is fed by only by more anger. It is at this point that Reuben steps away for some reason and in so doing, he leaves Joseph in the hands of his brothers.
**Key verses 37:23-24**
Genesis 37:23 So when Joseph came to his brothers, they stripped him of his robe, the robe of many colors that he wore. 24 And they took him and threw him into a pit. The pit was empty; there was no water in it. 25 Then they sat down to eat...
This 3rd key phase in Joseph’s life begins now when all he had known changes instantly as he is thrown into the pit. When these moments happen, the future will be dependent in many ways in how we respond to what has been done to us…will we become as those who abused us and “threw us in a pit”, or will we trust God as He is with us in the new difficulty that has become our present life. Joseph’s response to his “fresh pit life” sets the stage for God’s unfolding plan and the success of it. For without this, we don’t read all we are about to see in the life of Joseph.
Why This Story Matters Today
This point is why the story of Joseph is so relevant today and needs to be brought back into the church conversation. He models for us how to not let anger, bitterness, a bad family background lead to a life of being chained and bound by unforgiveness as those who abused us.
When I speak with other minister friends of mine, it has come to be clear that one of the most dominant sins in the church that is hard to deal with is unforgiveness. It has become in both our American and Church culture one of the prominent sins we seem to okay living with.
This mindset seems to come from our sense of entitlement that permeates so much around us and it has bled into our relationships where we feel that we have a right to hold onto the pain & nurse which only allows it to grow. We should not let ourselves off the hook in this area.
In case we were to think this thinking got cured by the New Testament – you see this philosophy in the older brother in the Prodigal Son story found in Luke 15.
We see it in our day in abuse, divorce & underlying rage that manifests itself at Wal-mart or McDonald’s.
We have lost the practice of forgiving and embraced the posture of watering the seeds of our anger.
There is so much to learn from Joseph in this area.
God has a plan and we can choose to fight it, ignore it & not learn the lessons from circumstances that come our way. In the moment, if we are not careful, down in the pit we will “choose poorly”, but we must “choose wisely”.
Something very important took place down in that empty pit while his brothers were at the top eating, and in some ways I think the decision that was made had already been settled in Josephs heart. I say this because there is no way that Joseph did not know where his brothers stood with him before this event happened. He had been learning to deal with their heartless love for some time before this event.
Though the passage does not specificallyspeak of it, something got settled down in the dark, empty & waterless pit that can serve us well.
Three Decisions Joseph Made
(1) Did not blame God for the pit
For some Christ-followers, an event like this would lead them to wonder:
If God is so Sovereign, why did I end up here?
It is impossible to live in this world and not be hurt by someone else’s sin. People we love leave our lives, leaving us wondering about the love that was once confessed and shared. Some of us have been verbally, physically, or sexually abused or been damaged by someone’s drinking or drug abuse. Some of us have children who manipulate or may have rebelled and caused us deep pain. Some of us have been the victims of a crime.
This is reality of living in a broken world - sin affects us all. If these moments come, we must not blame God for the pit and charge Him with wrong, for He is always good.
Look at these 3 key texts in Psalm 119…
Psalm 119:67 Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep your word.
Psalm 119:71 It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn your statutes.
Psalm 119:75 I know, O Lord, that your rules are righteous, and that in faithfulness you have afflicted me.
(2) Did not blame his family in that moment for his troubles
He trusted God down in the pit, did not blame his family, even though his family put him in it, Joseph embraced God’s Sovereignty in that moment.
There is something that happens in the darkness of life that can be so settled and firm, that you know you can get through it no matter what is going to come. I think Joseph sensed it – he was not alone.
Think of it a moment – Joseph had to know as they threw Him down into the pit that what would come next from a human standpoint was not going to go real well – he trusted anyway.
Again, I think something was already settled in Joseph’s heart - that God is bigger than anything that comes your way and He must be trusted no matter what.
(3) Chose not to Water the Seeds of Anger
A hurt not dealt with leads to…
- Prolonged anger leads to bitterness
- Bitterness lets unforgiveness grow
- Unforgiveness results in a hard heart
- The hard heart seeks to inflict hurt on those who initially hurt us.
For the brothers…
their anger, bitterness, unforgiveness and hard hearts
led them to desire to murder Joseph,
but he chose to not to allow their actions to lead him to be like them.
Q: How do we know he chose not to water the seeds of bitterness?
We know this for the rest of his life, his heart was ruled by trusting God. He is a very early picture of what James would later write…
James 1:20 for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
When we arrive at Genesis 39:2, Joseph is walking with God, God is with Him, he is successful and righteousness is thriving in his life. He is not walking in bitterness!
In the very end, Joseph will do these two things…
Genesis 45:4 So Joseph said to his brothers, “Come near to me, please.” And they came near. And he said, “I am your brother, Joseph, whom you sold into Egypt. 5 And now do not be distressed or angry with yourselves because you sold me here, for God sent me before you to preserve life. 6 For the famine has been in the land these two years, and there are yet five years in which there will be neither plowing nor harvest. 7 And God sent me before you to preserve for you a remnant on earth, and to keep alive for you many survivors. 8 So it was not you who sent me here, but God. He has made me a father to Pharaoh, and lord of all his house and ruler over all the land of Egypt.
Genesis 50:19 But Joseph said to them, “Do not fear, for am I in the place of God? 20 As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.21 So do not fear; I will provide for you and your little ones.” Thus he comforted them and spoke kindly to them.
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